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There is a story we are told about new motherhood. It is a beautiful, sun-drenched, and often deeply misleading story. It is a story of instant, overwhelming love, of blissful bonding, of a natural and effortless transition into the most sacred role a woman can play. It is a story told in soft-focus photographs, in glowing social media posts, and in the well-meaning, joyful congratulations of friends and family. And because this is the only story we are told, we believe it is the only one that is true.
So, when your own story feels terrifyingly different, when the arrival of your beautiful, longed-for child is accompanied not by a wave of bliss, but by a tidal wave of anxiety, a heavy, suffocating fog of sadness, or a frightening, hollow numbness, you can be left in a state of profound and agonizing isolation. A cruel and shaming voice may begin to whisper in your mind, “What is wrong with me? I’m supposed to be happy. This is supposed to be the best time of my life. Why do I feel this way? I must be a terrible mother.”
If this is your secret, silent story, I want to meet you in that dark and lonely place with a truth that I hope can be a lifeline for you: You are not a bad mother. You are a good mother who is experiencing a very real, very common, and very treatable medical illness called postpartum depression. The way you are feeling has nothing to do with your love for your child or your worth as a mother. It is a complex and powerful storm created by a convergence of immense biological, psychological, and social forces. Your pain is not a sign of your failure; it is a sign that you are a human being who has gone through a monumental life-altering event and are in need of gentle, compassionate support.
This article is a sacred and spacious container for your experience. It is a place to dismantle the shame, to demystify the illness, and to illuminate the clear and hopeful path toward healing. With profound empathy and insights from the expert team at Mind to Heart, let’s explore this tender territory together. The Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh know that this conversation is a life-saving one.
The first and most important step toward healing is clarity. The confusion between the very common “baby blues” and the more serious condition of postpartum depression (PPD) is often what keeps so many women suffering in silence. Let’s gently untangle them.
The “baby blues” are an incredibly common experience, affecting up to 80% of new mothers. In the first few days and up to two weeks after giving birth, you may find yourself feeling weepy, moody, anxious, and overwhelmed. You might cry for reasons you can’t explain. This is a direct and normal physiological response to the colossal hormonal crash that happens after delivery, combined with profound sleep deprivation and the sheer shock of your new reality. The baby blues are real and they are difficult, but they are transient. They come and they go, and they typically resolve on their own within a couple of weeks without any specific treatment.
Postpartum Depression (PPD), on the other hand, is different. It is not a normal adjustment period; it is a clinical depressive episode that is more intense, more persistent, and profoundly debilitating. It can begin anytime within the first year after giving birth, and it does not go away on its own. It is an illness that settles in like a thick, heavy fog, affecting every aspect of your being and your ability to function. While the baby blues are a passing shower, PPD is a persistent, heavy, and disorienting storm. Understanding this distinction is crucial, because it allows you to see that what you are experiencing may not be something you just have to “get through,” but a real illness that deserves real treatment from a Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh.
To truly release the immense shame that so often accompanies PPD, we must understand that this is not a psychological failing. It is a “biopsychosocial” illness, meaning it is caused by a perfect storm of biological, psychological, and social factors. Let’s explore these forces with compassion.
The biological tsunami that occurs after childbirth is perhaps the most powerful and least appreciated force in all of human biology. During pregnancy, your body is producing the hormones estrogen and progesterone at incredibly high levels. The moment you give birth, the levels of these hormones plummet, crashing down to pre-pregnancy levels within a matter of hours. This is the most abrupt and dramatic hormonal shift a woman will ever experience in her entire life. It is a hormonal earthquake. These hormones have a profound impact on the mood-regulating neurotransmitters in your brain. To expect your emotional state to remain stable in the face of this biological cataclysm is simply unrealistic. Your brain is scrambling to recalibrate in the midst of a chemical storm. Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh from Mind to Heart can help you understand this powerful biological component, which can be a profound relief.
This hormonal crash is compounded by the brutal reality of profound sleep deprivation. In the early weeks and months of a baby’s life, unbroken sleep is a distant memory. Sleep is not a luxury; it is a fundamental biological necessity for mental health. Without it, the parts of our brain responsible for emotional regulation, rational thought, and coping with stress simply cannot function properly. Chronic sleep deprivation is a known and effective form of torture for a reason. You are not weak because you are struggling to cope; you are a human being who is being deprived of a basic biological need. This is on top of the immense physical recovery from childbirth, whether it was a vaginal birth or a C-section. Your body is in a state of deep, and often painful, healing.
Alongside this biological upheaval, there is a profound psychological earthquake: the monumental identity shift from “woman” to “mother.” This is not a simple addition to your life; for many, it is a complete and total demolition of the self they once knew. You may have lost your professional identity, your financial independence, the freedom and autonomy to control your own time, and even the feeling of being at home in your own body, which may now feel foreign and unfamiliar. There is a very real and very valid grief in this. You can be deeply in love with your new baby and, at the same time, be grieving the loss of your old life and your old self. This ambivalent grief is often shamed and unspoken, but it is a central part of the postpartum experience. The Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh at Mind to Heart create a safe space to honor this complex and valid grief.
And finally, all of this is happening inside a cultural social pressure cooker. We are fed a relentless and unrealistic myth of the “perfect mother.” She is blissful, she is natural, she bonds instantly with her baby, she loves breastfeeding, she is never tired, she is never bored, she is never resentful. Her home is beautiful, her body “bounces back,” and her heart is filled with nothing but a pure, serene, and maternal glow. This is a lie. But it is a powerful one.
When your own messy, painful, and exhausting reality does not match this cultural fantasy, you can be flooded with a profound sense of shame and a feeling of being a failure. This pressure is amplified by the curated perfection of social media, where it can seem like every other new mother is living in a state of blissful perfection. This is happening at a time of profound isolation. In many traditional cultures, new mothers were surrounded by a village of women—their mothers, aunts, sisters, and neighbors—who cared for them, fed them, and guided them. In our modern world, the new mother is often left utterly alone in her home, a lonely island with a tiny, demanding new inhabitant, trying to figure everything out from scratch. It is a perfect recipe for a mental health crisis. Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh understands the profound impact of this social and cultural context.
So, with this compassionate understanding of the forces at play, let’s now explore the many faces of this storm. What does PPD actually look and feel like? It is so much more than just sadness.
One of the most frightening and shame-inducing symptoms for many women is the experience of intrusive thoughts. These are unwanted, repetitive, and often terrifying thoughts or mental images, frequently involving something bad happening to the baby. They can flash into your mind without warning and cause a surge of horror and panic. You may have a sudden, terrifying image of dropping the baby, or of them suffocating in their sleep. It is of the utmost, life-and-death importance to understand this: having these scary thoughts is an incredibly common symptom of postpartum anxiety and OCD, and it does not mean you are a bad mother or that you are going to harm your child. In fact, the horror and disgust you feel in response to these thoughts is a sign that they are “ego-dystonic”—they are the opposite of what you truly want. This is very different from postpartum psychosis, which is a rare but very serious condition involving a break from reality. If you are having these thoughts, it is essential to speak about them to Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh who is trained in perinatal mental health. They will meet you not with judgment, but with reassurance and a clear plan to help.
For many women, PPD does not manifest as tears, but as a hot, simmering, and often explosive rage and irritability. You may find yourself with no patience, no frustration tolerance. You might feel a surge of rage at your partner for a minor offense, or even at your crying baby, which can then trigger a tidal wave of guilt and shame. This anger is not who you are. It is the raw, primal scream of a nervous system that is completely and utterly overwhelmed. It is the voice of a person who is sleep-deprived, in pain, and trying to cope with an impossible level of demand. It is the protective fury of a mama bear whose own system is in a state of profound distress.
Many women also experience a profound numbness and disconnection. This is the anhedonia we have spoken of, but in the context of new motherhood, it can feel particularly cruel. It is the experience of going through the motions of caring for your baby—feeding, changing, bathing—but feeling like you are a robot, a babysitter. It is looking at your beautiful child and feeling a terrifying blankness where you believe a rush of maternal love should be. This is often the deepest source of shame. “What kind of a mother doesn’t feel bonded with her own baby?” Please, hear this: This is a neurological symptom. The bonding process is a complex hormonal and neurological dance, and depression can temporarily disrupt the music. It is not a reflection of your love. Your love is there, underneath the fog. The bond will come. The Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh are here to help you find your way back to it.
And of course, there is the overwhelming anxiety and panic. This can manifest as a constant, looping worry about the baby’s health and safety. You might find yourself obsessively checking on their breathing all night long, unable to sleep. You might be terrified to be left alone with the baby, convinced you will do something wrong. This anxiety can escalate into full-blown panic attacks—a sudden, terrifying surge of physical symptoms like a racing heart, shortness of breath, and a feeling of impending doom—that can leave you feeling trapped and terrified in your own home.
If this is your reality, if you see yourself in this storm, please know that you do not have to endure it alone, and you do not have to “just push through it.” You are a good mother, and the most powerful and loving thing a good mother can do is to get the support she needs so she can be healthy and present for her child. The most courageous step is the first one: breaking the silence. It is the act of turning to your partner, a trusted friend, or your doctor and speaking the five most powerful words: “I am not okay. I need help.” This is not a confession of failure; it is a declaration of your profound strength.
The path to healing is a multi-faceted one, and it is paved with compassion. Therapy is a cornerstone of recovery. Finding a counsellor who specializes in perinatal mental health is like finding a skilled and compassionate guide who can come into the storm with you. The therapy room becomes a sanctuary where you can speak your most unspeakable fears and feelings without any fear of judgment. It is a space to grieve the birth experience you may have had, the loss of your old self, and to process the immense identity shift. Therapies like CBT can help you challenge the negative thought patterns, and a therapy like EMDR can be profoundly healing if your PPD was triggered or worsened by a traumatic birth experience. Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh can be an essential part of your healing team in this case.
For many women, medication can also be a life-saving tool. There is a great deal of misinformation and shame surrounding the use of antidepressants, especially while breastfeeding. It is essential to have a conversation with a knowledgeable psychiatrist or doctor. For many, antidepressants are a safe and incredibly effective tool that can help to re-regulate the brain chemistry that has been thrown into chaos. They do not “fix” the problem, but they can lift the fog enough to allow you to engage in therapy, to bond with your baby, and to feel like yourself again. It is not a weakness; it is a form of medical support for a medical illness.
And finally, there is the profound power of connection and practical support. Connecting with other new mothers, particularly in a PPD support group, can be the ultimate antidote to shame and isolation. To sit in a room with other women who can look at you with tears in their eyes and say, “Me too,” is a profoundly healing experience. And you must, to the best of your ability, learn to accept practical help. Let people bring you meals. Let them hold the baby while you take a shower. Let them do your laundry. You are not a superhero; you are a human being in a state of profound depletion. Receiving support is essential.You are not a bad mother; you are a good mother who is experiencing a treatable illness. The mother you dreamed of being is already inside of you, waiting for the fog to lift. The love for your child is the powerful, unwavering anchor that will see you through this. If you are looking for the Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh to help you find your way back to the beautiful truth of who you are, the best counselor in Bangladesh is one who can meet you in this tender time with skill, warmth, and unwavering hope. Mind to Heart has the Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh. Our top online and offline counsellors are here to provide a safe, compassionate, and non-judgmental sanctuary for you to heal. The Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh at our clinic, a top counselling psychologist at Mind to Heart, understands the immense pressure you are under and is here to offer you both profound expertise and deep, human compassion. Let the Best Counselling Psychologist in Bangladesh at Mind to Heart be your lighthouse in the storm. You, and your beautiful baby, are so worthy of your wellness.
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